This Game Deserves Abusive Reviews
It's one thing for a game to try to teach me something while I am playing it, but what this game tried to teach me was not the least bit meaningful, rather, it was lecturing me on the importance of being earnest in my review, and that is why this game sucks.
It's one thing to ask me to be reasonable when I pass judgment on a game and leave it an informative opinion for other people to consider in their process, but
for "The Abusive Review Quiz," I cannot help but find to be utterly whiny in it's overall tone, a game that tries to appeal to me in a way that is simplistic and boring. It's one thing to respond to the haters, whiners, flamers, Nazis, racists, 4channers, and other such refuse that lurk the internets and to give them their just desserts by ousting them from the discussion entirely, but what a lot of users on Newgrounds don't know is that the "abuse" button can be used to throw out reviews that people just don't find desirable because it besmirches their beloved flash. It's one thing to claim that my reviews are useless if they don't say exactly what people WANT to read or spoonfeed them cheats and walkthroughs, it's no skin off my nose. But it is incredibly lame to claim I'm being "abusive" when my review is not in standing with what the rabid fans think I should say. Take Salad Fingers, for instance. I thought the latest episode of Salad Fingers just plain sucked. It sucked so bad that I could help but succinctly state that the episode was a turd, because, if you watch that piece of shit, that's what it was. But rather than get a response from the author telling me at the very least "You just don't get the complexities and idiosyncracies of my surrealism," my review gets pegged as "abusive," because the fans, and surely enough, the creator himself, just can't take the heat of criticism. Look, if you're gonna make art, and present it to other people, you WILL get a response, and it's quite foolish of the artist to expect universal positivity. I have infinitely more respect for an artist that takes the reviews and turns them on their heads (something Hacsev attempted, but failed, at doing) in a creative and interesting way. This particular flash, I find, would have come off a little bit better if the artist made it into a movie instead of an unentertaining quiz used for the sake of sensitivity training.
Now that my kvetching is done, allow me to reprint the gist of Bowser231's insanely helpful review. Enjoy the easy medals, y'all!
WALKTROUGH
1=Helpful
2=Useless
3=Abusive
23313331213121223231(in order,so on 1st question its useless,2nd abusive...)
Click the middle icon on bottom(looks like angry faic) (+10 pts)
Right click,the click you cheater!(+50 pts)
RANKS
20=Deity
16-19=Gold
12-15=Silver
8-11=Bronze
4-7=Normal
0-3=Garbage
THINK THATS WRONG:
I think 9th review is abusive.
I think 16th review is abusive too.