Hello,

Been a while. I’ve been just taking trips to the hospital back n forth about some abdominal issues lately, not very fun.

But besides that, I have been struggling with suicidal thoughts for the past 3 weeks, I have some very personal problems that make me feel like I am a disgrace to society, I almost damn near went ahead with my plans a week ago. Fortunately, none of that happened though.

Felt I should draw something up to maybe just release my stress about these thoughts, this piece is meant to represent how I actually view myself in the mirror, as opposed to how I actually look from the outside. The immense sorrow and hatred I feel for myself. How I always stare my nightmares in the eyes, unable to focus on anything else other than it, even when there’s probably a way out.

I generally try to ignore these thoughts, but they always linger in the back of my head, and become intensely loud as the day goes on, and theeen, it’s just a continuous-loop every day.

Now, this post isn’t meant to be a cry for help, even though I appreciate the people who do try to actually help me out, but It’s genuinely been a rollercoaster for me, I just hope everything will get better some day, heh.

Nothing beats the power of creating though, never stop creating and always strive to be inspirational for others!

I think that’s a beautiful thing.

Your mental health is the utmost of importance, never hesitate to talk with anybody about the problems you are facing, you are not alone, we are all in this together!

If you read all of this, thank you for your time, I wish you a happy day and a merry life, my apologies for the trauma dump lol!

And, I want to thank all my friends and kind strangers who have tried to help out and let me vent to them about my issues, especially Eggu!