A few years ago, I like many people around me, had the pleasure of coming across what is now one of the most Popular Books of all time. The book called Go The Fuck To Sleep By Adam Mansbach:

The book was credited as "The Children's Book For Adults" and for good reason too.

The book in the style of a children's nursery Rhyme story, depicts a frustrated parent trying everything he can to get his kid to go to sleep.

The book became a massive success and spawned many sequels such as You Have to Fucking Eat and Fuck Now There are Two of You. Just two years ago, he made a parody on Covid-19 called Stay The Fuck Home. Man that guy really needs to watch his motherfucking fucking language.

However what made this book reach superstardom was two famous Narrators.

The first was a re-telling of the book by none other than Samuel L. Jackson:

Whom despite his own status as a memetic badass, actually got trumped by an even more hilarious source. Lavar Burton. Reprising his role as the Host of the hit educational PBS program, Reading Rainbow.

However, there was one thing I noticed that Mansbach hasn't covered yet, that every parent, babysitter or anyone who's personal or professional title involves the helping of the development of children would tell you. "So you got them to go the fuck to sleep. So what? Try waking them up for school the next day." That's where I came in.

I decided to do a parody poem based off this book. Only the parent has trouble waking up his kid in time for school. Every parent, babysitter, teacher, maid, nanny and anyone else who's personal and professional life involves helping raise kids, would easily relate to that, just as they relate to them having trouble getting them to sleep.

Lyrics:

The cats want away from their kittens.

The sheep want the lambs with the pup.

It's 7:00 Am and it's time for school, wake the fuck up.

The windows shine bright with the Sun.

Hummingbirds feed on fresh buttercups.

7:30 now, breakfast is ready. Wake the fuck up.

The eagles are off flying high.

Other creatures wake like the undead.

I know you're not tired, that's bullshit, stop it.

Get the fuck outta your bed.

It's 8 O'Clock right now.

Breakfast is long since old

Your food wouldn't be cold, you're milk wouldn't be warm.

Had you woke the fuck up, like I told.

You finally wake in my car.

School is just a mile away.

You're going in your PJ's motherfucker.

Because you didn't wake up today.

We barely make it on time.

The kids get ready to laugh.

"Should have woke the fuck up." They said.

How can they be so daft.

Before it was time to go,

I gave you a drink to help.

I realized it's the breakfast milk.

But it was too late for the whelp.

He made it too the door.

Everything seemed so upkeep.

But he collapsed on the way in.

And he went the fuck to sleep.

FUCK!!