This has the potential to be an amazing song

There's only a few things holding it back.

Reverb- not nearly enough. The lack of reverb is very noticable in the snares, which sound absolutely dry.
Timpani- Having it play A over again even when the bassline had moved to D was probably not a great musical choice.
Mix- Too many instruments in the same octave range. In particular, the section around and following :56, when the trumpet, violin, and organ are all playing at the same time, nothing stands out.
Ending- Way too abrupt.

But well done emphasizing dynamics and great choices. Those two are the main pluses on this piece. If those changes above are implemented though, you could have the next top30 song!

hmm...poetry

The poetry is good, do you make things like that as a side hobby? Although there are some grammar problems but that's beside the point. This song is appropriately titled. Well done! Hope to see more of work in the future along with your poetry. Good Luck to you.