hmm.

i see what your saying XP. not a bad attempt, i encourage you to make music man. this has lots of amateur elements easily pointed out.

a good rule to live by, if its not awesome, make it awesome. right now, this is not awesome, but it wants to be.

practice making songs dude, you wont beleive the amount of songs i have not submitted to ng becuase i ended up not liking them after I was finished. You have to feel very ocnfident in your work nowayadays man.

good luck.

=D hmmmm

Ok beat. Tad bit annoying, but I'm ok with it.

A lot of work is visible, though...