You'll likely want to add more variance to your next reel. Keeping with the first voice for a full thirty seconds was a bit unnecessary, particularly given that the point of a demo reel is to showcase your acting ability. Aim for a larger quantity of brief scenes to really push for a reel that displays your full range of abilities.

Additionally, you should consider adding a few scenes that include more intense emotion -- something to really showcase your acting ability. As it stands, all of your scenes sound like you're whispering, or trying to restrain your voice.
Get expressive. Really try to get into your characters, and you'll find your scenes will come across a lot more convincingly.