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Spaghetti Romance

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I learned how to animate. more to come soon :D


Music is officially licensed and used with permission.

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The whole bit with the chair falling over was pretty confusing as it's only shown in shadow and never through any action that the chair is shoddily repaired. As it is you are left thinking "the worm sure did... something (worm wiggling thought bubble), and now the chef shat himself in fear (i still don't know what that SFX is supposed to be) at seeing the worm he just caught and put on the table, and died? Oh, I guess something broke."
The cut to the worm on the ground, with another chair leg in front that you do a fast camera move around to a close up ends up being disorienting as you can't really tell what it is, even with a spotlight. Some wobble as the chef sits rather than the impeccably solid slam, along with some better lighting would really help to set up the fall. With the unrepair sequence itself, positioning the camera a bit closer to the broken leg would make it so you wouldn't need to have the foreground leg obscure the whole screen. Having some shots wider during the sequence would also help give the viewer context for what is happening.

Storytelling aside, the textures and lighting were a bit distracting. It seems like you were trying a lot of different things with the materials, and while I think it felt a bit too incoherent here, it's at least good to learn different techniques so you know how to move ahead more solidly. As for lighting, the end is a bit too blue, and the shadows are a bit dark, especially for how much takes place in the shadows. It seems like you realized that to a degree and added some light for the chair unfixing, but a similar treatment could be used for the previous jumping scene to keep the worm more readable.

It's a fun idea for a short, and being able to sit down and take a shot at executing it is pretty good. Keep at it!

YummyOS responds:

Tysm for the critique! I'm still very new to this so the amount of detail you went into here was unexpected but means a lot! <3

This is pretty cute. I hope to see more from you and your little 3d creatures.

YummyOS responds:

Thanks dude!

Credits & Info

Views
321
Votes
71
Score
3.36 / 5.00

Uploaded
Aug 19, 2022
4:22 PM EDT
Software
  • Blender
Misc. Kit
  • Sony Vegas Pro 14