well, this is still well done!!!
Reviews for "PSYCHE 2: FamilyofNoRest"
Pretty good work on this
i meant to click 3. i'm a little drunk right now.
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Text needs improving
I found it hard to make out what the news report type text scrolling from right to left was saying. You might also want to improve readability of other text as well.
not ready for prime time
Well, I like the idea that there are seperate episodes, which makes you think about each one and digest it for a while.
I like the idea that we don't have all the information as to what is going on; it adds to the suspense, uncertainty, fear, and intrigue. This is probably your biggest STRENGTH. Not unlike the work of many great storytellers: David Lynch, George Orwell, Aldous Huxley, Thomas Pynchon. It allows the viewer's imagination to fill in the details. THIS IS A CRITICAL ASPECT OF YOUR STYLE.
Reminiscent of George Orwell as he opens "1984": "It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen." is the smoldering desperation suggested in "The day was cold I have a scarf to keep me warm. I dont know what to believe anymore." Absolutely brilliant! The juxtaposition of elements perfectly conveys the protagonist's sense of inner confusion. GREAT STYLE! "
"The fifth victim is at [sic] her third week of illness." Again it is these little details, which a person things about their daily lives, which add realism and layers of complexity to the narrative. GREAT STYLE!
It's "affect" not "effect." Look it up.
Again, I would consider adding either more detail to the drawings or more animation. The word overlays are really good. I like how they drift across the screen like scattered thoughts. But some things, like the dialogue, you could get voices for that part. It would help to demarcate the inner and outer world of the protagonist, as well.
It has a lot of potential, just not ready yet. Emphasize your STYLE and I have no doubt you will be a success.