I got an account on newgrounds to review this
Okay i wrote a really long review and it didnt go through so im gonna shorten it down.
First I have to say. There is a difference between a story line and a plot. When responding to EvilZak on the 19th you said "And you know, the first part of a series isn't always fast pace. It's an introduction to the characters, etc."Ok at the start, a plot of the series isn't faced pace, this is true. However the STORYLINE which is the beginning middle and end must always be interesting. No excuses. The first part of Berserk was fast paced. Actually the first part of alot of things can be fast paced. Its all in how you present it and you did a bad job. I think people liked your plot not your story line. It sux to hear people say that they liked the storyline when it clearly wasnt up to par.
Your dialogue is middle school quality at best. First line Marle: "Where are we?" Okay she didnt know where she was going when she stepped into that portal. I'm assuming that they all knew exactly where they were going. This is senseless. You didnt think that line through. Marle would not have said that.
Writing is hard work and its pretty upsetting when you say things like "And yes storyline is my strong point and is what draws the crowd in" when responding to Flashhound on the 20th.
I feel story is VERY important when making a sprite movie like this. Your story was just boring as many have said.
Next is your character development. Naturally at the start there isnt much room for that. BUT! You worry me with your comment about magus in one of your responses to a review on the 20th. "If he joined your party he would become a good guy but Frog would never regain his humanity. If you chose to fight him, then the curse on Frog will be broken and he will turn into a human once again at the end of the game." No matter what you choose there magus still had good intentions. The choice you had was wether frog would recognize this or not. Your choice doesnt CHANGE or ALTER magus's personality. Hes still the same guy. So in the end. Yes making him a Bad kinda mad guy was a mistake.
Okay last things im going to talk about is the stuff i dont have much room to talk about since i dont animate.
Graphics were grrrrreat.
Style sucked...not original...but it was sprites so you cant expect that. And no im not a sprite hater. Bottom line is using other already created ideas isnt original.
Sound...meh music was okay. You picked good songs.
The fight scenes were great. I actually liked the chrono vs. chrono one. Liked how they locked swords and all that towards the end. That was awesome.
All in all your story has started bad. you can still fix it later in the series...wont say much about the plot...but judging by your dialogue and story im guessing this is gonna be a shallow plot at best. Ill be watching.
